I am sick and tired of cooking. No, that’s not right. I don’t mind the act of cooking – what I really hate is cleaning up after myself.
Let’s see. I got married when I was 18, so even if you only figure one meal a day (and believe me, that’s a very conservative number) and throw in a handful of breakfasts, that’s 15,000 meals. Fifteen.Freakin’.Thousand!
It was 96 degrees here today, so I planned a simple chicken salad. Here’s how that worked out:
I baked a loaf of sourdough rye bread in the morning.
• One small bowl for the “sponge”
• One mixing bowl and dough hook
• Two measuring cups, 2 measuring spoons
• One large bowl for letting the dough rise
• One bread pan
• One lasagna pan to add steam to the oven
• One serrated knife to cut the bread
• One bread board
• Oh, and one butter knife!
Boiled and deboned a chicken. Couldn’t waste the broth, so added veggies and cooked it down to put in the freezer. I have a sick dog, so I also cooked some rice using some of the broth and added chicken and cottage cheese.
• One large stock pot
• One cutting board and knife for the veggies
• One small pan for the rice
• One measuring cup and spoon
• One bowl for the dog food mixture
• One strainer for the broth
Made the salad.
• One knife for the lettuce (I know. I cut instead of properly tearing the lettuce. Don’t judge!)
• One strainer to wash the lettuce
• One peeler for the cucumber
• One cutting board for the cucumber, Kalamata olives, tomatoes, and green onions
• One grater for the fresh Parmesan cheese
• One salad bowl and salad tongs
Made croutons, using the rye bread
• One knife
• One cutting board
• One small bowl for tossing the bread cubes in oil and seasonings
• One cast iron skillet for cooking the croutons.
Made dressing
• One small bowl
• One whisk
Add two dinner plates, forks, and wine water glasses. Do you see why my kitchen is never spotless? If I could just be “normal” and buy a pre-cooked chicken, some salad greens, a bottle of dressing, and a bag of croutons my life would be so much simpler. But I can’t DO that. Well…occasionally I’ll break down and go the easy route, but I save money this way and make sure we don’t eat ingredients that I can’t pronounce.
But the real bitch of this is, even though everything tastes great, it’s just another meal.
Baking is even messier, but the reward is something that is covered with chocolate, or filled with maple cream, or bursting with raisins. Baking is a joy.
Sometimes I cook because it’s fun, but mostly I cook because I must. And since I don’t have a maid to clean up behind me, I spend a lot of time doing dishes that never end. Tonight was #15,001.
And that’s what wine is for.
Oh you poor dear girl! Perhaps you need to see how someone who isn’t OCD prepares food. I make those dishes stretch 😉
You hit that nail on the head! I was going to mention OCD, but was afraid I’d offend someone. Oh well. Doing the math justified my ranting and whining tonight. I’ll get over it 😉
See??? This is why I hate to cook. I hate washing dishes even more! I had to do all the housework when I was a kid, too. No thanks. I do as little as possible. I want to enjoy my life.. Love ya Lori!
Sigh. I know. You have to either really love to cook or really like to do dishes OR (and this is my dream) have someone following behind you cleaning as you go.
I LOVE that you said what we all think. I hate that I have to clean up after cooking and baking and actually think it through to try to use as few bowls and utensils as possible. But the dinner part, I’m with you there. I just told my husband that there’s nothing for dinner cause I’m sick of everything I make. Time for some new recipes, but too hot to experiment. Classic conundrum (which happens to be the name of a wine I like)!
Did your husband believe you? Mine didn’t.
After you’ve made 10,000 dinners or so, you do run out of things that sound interesting. If it were just me, I’d graze all day and never put together an actual meal again.
It’s still fun when company’s coming, though. So…that must mean that the same meal that doesn’t impress your family after hundreds of repeats has the potential for being a big hit for someone else, and face it – we’re foodies, so we’re also approval junkies!
The solution would be to invite guests over a lot. Oh. Never mind. I’d have to clean even MORE then. Pffft.
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Hahaha love it ! and can relate , cleaning up is a pain , i much prefer to make the mess !
There is no creativity involved in washing dishes. At least, not that I can find. Maybe heaven for foodies is a place where there are enormous kitchens, hungry (appreciative) crowds, and pots and pans that miraculously disappear. Ahhhhhhhh.