January Fly on the Wall (my 1 year anniversary edition!)

Posted on January 24, 2014 by Lorinda

I can’t believe it’s been a year since I joined Fly and started doing my dirty laundry in public! I love this venue and am always willing to spill my guts, so writing a Fly on the Wall post each month is fun and challenging and…cathartic. If you’ve missed any of them, you can always scroll down my home page and choose Fly on the Wall from the categories on the right. You’ll learn more than you ever wanted to know about me AND my reluctant family.

Hubby has lightened up (or just been slowly broken down) over the year and allows me to post semi-embarrassing photos of him. However, “He Who Shall Not Be Named on Social Media Sites” (or Lord Voldemort) is still holding tough. I tried to sneak a photo of him in there a while back and he is still in a snit over it. Meh.

In case you’re new to the whole “Fly” phenomenon, a group of bloggers gets together each month and describes what a fly on the wall of their house would hear and see. Things that either aren’t usually discussed in public or that aren’t worth writing an entire blog about. YOU are the fly, and here is what was happening in my house. (The links to the other 13 bloggers’ posts are at the bottom of the page. You don’t think I’d give them to you before you had the chance to read my post, do you? I’m not that nice!)

Somehow I manage to write posts, comment and opinionate on 5,847 Facebook statuses a day, and edit photos with an archaic laptop that is on its last legs. I broke the hinges so the lid flops willy-nilly. I vacuumed off the “U” key cover. I somehow managed to eliminate my editing option and now have to move each photo to Picmonkey to crop and save. I also managed to blow out 2 of the 3 ports, which is causing me grief. And my mouse turned its little belly up and died. You have been hearing some VERY bad language this month, and I’m truly sorry about offending your little fly ears. (I’m embarrassed to admit how long I spent at this point trying to put ears on a photo of a fly. I give up. Guess you’ll have to just imagine it.)

You heard something like this:

“Oh, crap. This is hard. I can’t do this without my F*@/%*G mouse! How am I supposed to copy this? It won’t let me scroll down! What the @*?/% did it just do? Holy s%*t!” Well, I’m sure you get the general idea.

Oh, such a sick little puppy.

And then Lord V (who is getting more impatient as each day progresses) has to come and show me how the youngsters do it, with their finger on that little square part of the computer. He gets really upset when I use two hands. Apparently this is like driving with two feet. Unacceptable. I am supposed to be able to hold down the left clicky thing with my thumb and then move the cursor with the finger on the SAME HAND! He assures me it will come naturally after some practice.

When he’s not looking, I cheat. Don’t squeal on me, okay?

The good thing is, he’s so tired of helping me that he’s promised to bring his “old” laptop back the next time he comes this way and give it to me. It is light-years newer and better than this one, so I’m truly thrilled to be getting my son’s hand-me-downs. Pathetic, huh?

In spite of this handicap, I will bravely carry on.

I’m sure all the bad language in the beginning of this post has clued you in, but if not…and you think that THIS…

…is what I’m like, well, hey. That works for me! Someone else thought so too, because I got a SUNSHINE AWARD from friend and fellow blogger Tamara of Confessions of a part-time working mom. She’s delusional, but I love her. Mwah!

For Christmas Eve our good friends Missy and Joseph braved the ice and snow and came over for dinner. We feasted on crab chowder and french rolls, and they brought all kinds of snacky stuff. The highlight for me was Joseph’s fudge. He substituted Irish Cream for the evaporated milk. He also used chopped unsalted mixed nuts in place of walnuts. May I just say…….burp?

I’m really glad everything turned out well, (though between the eggnog and the wine, I probably wouldn’t have cared too much) because the next day – Christmas Day – I had a major baking fail. It happens. Doesn’t this look like a yummy pumpkin pie? We didn’t have one for Thanksgiving and someone was pouting about it, so I made a nice one with the last of my expensive brandy in it.

Hooray!!! Pumpkin pie for Christmas dinner!

Hooray!!! Pumpkin pie for Christmas dessert!

Sigh. Next time I’ll remember the sugar!

And in case you’re wondering, no amount of whipped cream (or brandy) in the world can salvage a sugarless pumpkin pie. The chickens loved it, though. Merry Christmas, ladies.

Here’s justice for you: whenever Lord Vodemort is over here, one of his favorite activities is “brushing” the hair off of our yellow lab with his hand (he calls it petting. Hah.) and depositing it on the carpet or furniture, with a promise to clean it up later. I’m sure you can guess that “later” never happens.

So. I combed Otis every chance I got, and used the pile of yellow fur to make Lord V a special pillow for Christmas. It’s really nice – with cougar and deer and bear on it. He doesn’t have a clue what’s inside, and unless he actually reads one of my blog posts, he will never know.

But I will. Bwa ha ha ha ha ha.

Making the pillow. (Not enough hair – had to use some poly too.)

Otis liked it!

I’m almost through with the physical therapy for my ankle. It bends all directions. It’s pretty strong. It’s only painful if I stand for hours at a time. I can even walk down stairs now without going sideways like a crab. Do you know what I can’t do? What I fail miserably at and will probably keep me in therapy for the rest of my life? I can’t balance.

Now…I never could balance well, but since right now I can balance better on my uninjured ankle, it’s obvious that my bad ankle has taken my natural uncoordination to a new level. And not being able to balance well would just lead to more slips and sprains…or worse. So I am practicing.

I love my therapist, I really do. She’s awesome, and funny, and kind. Except when she puts me on a big half-ball. Flat on the bottom, domed on the top. Spongy. Hard to stand on. Since I kept falling off when I tried to stand on it, we graduated to the next step and she THREW BALLS AT ME while I clung precariously on this instrument of torture. You know what else I suck at? Throwing a ball. Ask my son – I can’t even throw a ball from my chair to the couch where he is sitting. So of course I am expected to stand on a ball, throwing a ball.

I just can’t talk about it anymore. Sniff.

Last Sunday was the big game. The game that is sending the Seattle Seahawks to the Superbowl! My daughter and her family now live in California, but still were loyally rooting for the Hawks…even at a 49ers party they went to. Here is grandson Mack “persuading” a young 49ers fan that the Hawks were the best team!

His mom swears he was going in for a kiss, but I see him looking for the jugular.

I usually end with some embarrassing photo or story about my husband, but for the life of me I can’t come up with one this month. I’m truly sorry – I’ll watch him like a hawk next month!

Here are 12 fun blogs to go visit. See what kind of craziness they’ve been up to!

Baking In a Tornado
Just a Little Nutty
Menopausal Mother
The Sadder But Wiser Girl
Follow Me Home
Spatulas on Parade
The Momisodes
Stacy Sews and Schools
Searching for Sanity
The Lazy Mom’s Cooking Blog
Pink Heart String
Spinster Snacks

Succulent Salmon Dip (in a crunchy football bowl!)

Posted on January 22, 2014 by Lorinda

If you followed along as a group of us bloggers teamed up to bring you the 12 Cakes of Christmas, you already know that we are a crazy bunch of gals who inspire each other to greatness. Well…we try!

Once the holidays were over we realized that we just didn’t want to leave the party, so we decided to pick a theme every month and create recipes to match the theme. This month is Dippin’ Through January!

Football games just demand dips, and we have you covered.

Today is my day, and since I was born and raised in Seattle, AND since the Seahawks are going to the Superbowl (squeeee) I went all out and made a delicious salmon dip and a big french bread football bowl to serve it in. Fill it up and put the top back on until you’re ready to serve…then tear it up and use the chunks of bread to scoop up the dip. Here’s my easy recipe for a Football Dip Bowl. And, of course, the recipe for salmon dip!

Succulent Salmon Dip

Author: The Rowdy Baker

This is enough to make at least 8 hungry people very happy.

Ingredients

1½ pounds cooked salmon (canned is fine!)
8 ounces neufchatel or cream cheese
1 cup mayonnaise
2 teaspoons Worcestershire sauce
1 teaspoon liquid smoke (optional)
3 cloves garlic, pressed or minced very fine
4 slices thick bacon, chopped and cooked
1-2 tablespoons fresh lemon juice
6 green onions, sliced thinly
Salt and pepper to taste

Instructions

In a large bowl, combine salmon, neufchatel cheese, mayonnaise, Worcestershire sauce, liquid smoke, and garlic. Mix well using a sturdy wooden spoon or (if you don't mind the mess) your hands. Don't use a food processor - it will ruin the texture and turn the dip into baby food!
Stir in the bacon, lemon juice, green onions, and seasoning. Spoon into dip bowl.
Keep refrigerated until ready to serve.

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Also consider trying finely chopped celery, sliced olives, or grated Italian cheese!

So lucky to have friends that fish AND can!

Smoosh it up! (That’s a technical cooking term.)

Gotta have fresh lemon with salmon.

Remove the soft bread.

Remove the soft bread from the “lid” too.

Oh, YUM!

With all due respect to those of you who live in Colorado, may I just say…..GO HAWKS!

Here are links to the other dips that have already been posted.

1/13 Jalapeno Popper Dip from Moore or Less Cooking Blog
1/14 Melting Pot Swiss Cheese Fondue from Tampa Cake Girl
1/15 Rocky Road Brownie Batter Dip from Hun, What’s for Dinner?
1/16 Prosciutto Artichoke Spinach Dip from Crumbs in my Mustachio
1/17 Crab Rangoon Dip with Wonton Chips from Lemony Thyme
1/20 BLT Dip from Cooking from a SAHM
1/21 Apple French Toast Brunch Dip from Baking in a Tornado
1/22 My Succulent Salmon Dip
1/23 Yum Yum Dipping Sauce from Manila Spoon

Football Dip Bowl

Posted on January 21, 2014 by Lorinda

Here is the perfect bowl for serving dip at the Superbowl. Why? Because it’s festive, delicious, and you don’t have to wash it after the crowd leaves.

French bread is the easiest bread there is to make. It takes a little more time because it requires two risings before it’s shaped, but it is the closest thing to a “no-fail” bread I’ve ever tried. I usually put a pan of hot water in the oven to get it all steamy, which makes the crust more crispy, but this time I left that step out so it would be easier to slice the top off to make the bowl. It still came out crackly and crisp, but cut easily.

This recipe will make two large loaves. Even if you only need one dip bowl, go ahead and make them both footballs. That way you can pick the prettiest one for display, and a football is a pretty traditional French bread shape anyhow.

Once the bread has cooled, slice off the top and scoop out the insides. You may be able to turn the excess bread into croutons or bread crumbs, or just nibble as you work! Fill the bowl with your favorite dip and put the top back on until it’s time to serve. Then break up the top and use it for dipping.

Football Dip Bowl

Author: The Rowdy Baker

Makes 2 large dip bowls.

Ingredients

2½ cups very warm water
2 packages active dry yeast
1 teaspoon sugar
6 cups all-purpose flour (or bread flour)
1 tablespoon Kosher salt

Instructions

In a large bowl (a stand mixer is best) combine the water, yeast, and sugar. Allow it to it until bubbly - about 5 minutes.
Add 3 cups of flour and the salt and beat well.
Remove ¼ cup of dough and put it in a plastic zipper bag. Don't zip the top, just set it in the refrigerator for now.
Switch to a dough hook and add the remaining flour. Knead with the machine for 5 minutes, or if you're kneading by hand, put dough on a floured surface and knead for 7-8 minutes. Dough should be slightly sticky and very elastic.
Place dough in a large greased bowl, turning the dough to coat evenly. Cover and allow it to rise until doubled, about 1 hour.
Punch down dough, cover, and allow it to rise again until doubled, about 1 hour.
Punch down dough and divide it into 2 pieces. Shape one piece into a slightly skinny football. Repeat with the other piece of dough. Put both loaves on an ungreased baking sheet (you may sprinkle with cornmeal first if you wish) then cover and let rise until almost doubled.
When the dough is partly risen, heat the oven to 450 F. Give it plenty of time to get hot.
When the loaves have risen, remove the bag of soft dough from the refrigerator. Snip one of the corners off and squeeze side stripes, a center seam, and lacing on each loaf.
Bake for about 35 minutes, or until the loaves are a rich brown.
Cool thoroughly on a rack.

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Yeast is bubbly…Add the flour!

The dough – smooth and elastic!

First rise

Shaping the dough

Shape like a skinny football. It will puff out!

Squeeze on the designs and it’s ready for the oven!

Extra Spicy Gingersnaps

Posted on January 10, 2014 by Lorinda

When the weather turns cold and wintry, my first instinct is to start adding spices to everything. We just had a homemade chicken soup full of garlic, ginger, and homemade noodles (if you’re sick, this will cure whatever ails you) but since this is a baking blog, I had to look for something else to offer you. Something that would light a mild fire in your belly and make you sigh with happiness.

Something like EXTRA SPICY GINGERSNAPS!

If you know me or have been following my blogs, you’ll know that I rarely do things the easy way. It’s all about experimenting and finding new challenges. So just because I went all out and toasted and ground whole spices, that doesn’t mean you have to. These cookies will be very, very good if you use ground spices from your cupboard. If you want them to be excellent, however, here’s what you’ll want to do:

Toast those spices!

Put one whole nutmeg, 12 whole cloves, and 2 or 3 sticks of cinnamon (broken in half) in a small pan. Turn the burner on medium-low and cook for 4-5 minutes, shaking or stirring them often. When the fragrance hits you upside the head, they’re done!

Set the nutmeg aside to cool and put the cloves and cinnamon into a clean coffee grinder. It’s going to sound awful when you turn it on, but do it anyway! Grind those babies up as fine as possible. I sift mine through a small sieve to keep big chunks out of the cookie dough, and then put the remaining bits back in the grinder for a few more seconds.

Sift out the stubborn chunks.

Grate the toasted nutmeg with a fine grater. I used 1 teaspoon of freshly ground nutmeg in this recipe. You can wrap the rest of the whole nutmeg up in plastic wrap and save it for another day if you wish.

Grating nutmeg.

You will be seriously amazed by the added flavor freshly toasted spices add to baked goods.

However, since I’m pretty sure most of you are rolling your eyes back in your head right this very moment, I used regular spices in the recipe below. If you are making these cookies using freshly toasted spices (FIST BUMP!) use the entire amount you just ground up.

Extra Spicy Gingersnaps

Author: The Rowdy Baker

These gingersnaps will warm you to your toes, and make you come back for more! Makes approximately 4 dozen cookies.

Ingredients

1 cup butter, softened
1 cup brown sugar
1 cup white sugar
1 egg
½ cup molasses
2-3 teaspoons finely grated fresh ginger root
3 cups flour
2 teaspoons baking soda
1 teaspoon baking powder
½ teaspoon salt
1 teaspoon white pepper
3 teaspoons cinnamon
1 teaspoon ground cloves
1 teaspoon nutmeg
1 teaspoon ground ginger

Instructions

Heat oven to 375 F.
In a large bowl, beat the butter and both sugars together until well combined and fluffy.
Add the egg, molasses, and grated fresh ginger. Mix well.
Add the remaining ingredients and mix until thoroughly combined.
Roll level tablespoons of dough into balls and then roll each ball in a shallow dish of sugar to coat completely.
Place at least an inch apart on an ungreased cookie sheet. (Parchment is helpful, but not necessary.) Press down with a spatula or the bottom of a glass to flatten.
Bake for 10 minutes if you want the cookies to be a little chewy. Bake for 11 minutes if you like them crispy.
Remove from oven and place the baking sheet on a rack to cool for several minutes, then move the cookies to the rack to finish cooling.

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Roll in sugar

Flatten the dough.

fresh from the oven

At this point, you can just put the cookies on a plate and watch them disappear. OR you can decorate them a little with icing.

Decorative Icing
1 cup powdered sugar
2 teaspoons powdered egg whites
2 tablespoons water

Whisk all ingredients together and put in a small plastic bag. Cut the tip off the bag and drizzle over cookies. Allow the frosting to harden completely.

If you would like to roll the cookies out and cut them into shapes, it is possible, but a little more difficult. Chill the dough for at least an hour. Roll it out on a generously floured surface between 1/8-inch and 1/4-inch thick. Cut out your shapes, sprinkle with sugar if desired, and place at least 1 inch apart on an ungreased cookie sheet. Put the entire sheet in the freezer for 10 minutes. Bake at 375F for 10-11 minutes. They will spread a little, but the shapes will be recognizable.

Hearts.

This is the most fragrant cookie you will ever bake, and the dough…oh, my word…the dough is delicious. Ahem.

I love to keep some of the balls of dough in the freezer to pop in the oven when company’s coming over. The house smells heavenly and welcoming, and the cookies are always a hit. Keep warm, my friends!!!

Sunshine Award!

Posted on January 5, 2014 by Lorinda

It’s always exciting when a fellow blogger drops by to bestow an award. Today Confessions of a part-time working mom gave me the prestigious (!) Sunshine Award. I’m honored, and will be happy to play by the rules and give you seven random facts about myself, answer some questions, and pass on the love.

Right now I’m beaming sweetly at three pets and two men with all of my happy, sunshiny warmth. Excuse me? I’m a writer. I can spin this any way I want to! Neatly attired, makeup in place, hair coiffed, I am flitting around on this Sunday morning cleaning, baking, and spreading joy. As usual. Honest.

FANTASY

REALITY

Ahem. Shall we?

The Rules:
Display the award on your blog. Give 7 random facts about yourself. Answer the questions I had to answer. Then nominate any amount of bloggers you choose up to 11.

My 7 Facts:

Being in the garden grounds me. During the winter I drool over seed catalogs the way men drool over Victoria’s Secret catalogs. I close my eyes and imagine the heat of the sun on my shoulders, and am happy waiting for spring.
I am an empath. I often feel pain and distress that others are feeling, even if they are just acting a part. I have a terrible time watching a movie where someone is being hurt – emotionally or physically. It also makes me uncomfortable around strong emotions of any sort. I won’t deny you a shoulder to cry on, but will be very, very happy when everything’s back to normal.
I dog-ear books, which is a bad habit that I’ve been trying hard to break. Don’t lend me any books! I have so many bookmarks for this purpose, but still catch myself reaching for that upper right hand corner of the page.
I can’t resist black licorice in any form.
Housework is the devil. I do as much as I must just to be socially acceptable, but hate every minute of it. I did a lot of it when I was growing up; can I blame this issue on my parents?
I am “Eema” to my grandchildren, “Lorinda” to my past co-workers, “Lor” to my sisters and friend Mary, and “Lucy” to my husband. I’ll pretty much answer to anything.
I have no memory for faces. Unless I know you well, if we meet in the grocery store I will probably make generic conversation until I’ve placed you. It’s not intentional…just something I struggle with.

My Questions:

1. If you could go back in time ten years and tell yourself one thing, what would it be?
Answer: Work is just work. Don’t take it home! Scrape your feet off going out the company door and come home happy.

2. What’s your favorite ice cream flavor?
Answer: Seriously? You expect me to choose just one? I have it narrowed down to three, but that’s the best I can do. Second runner-up is Rocky Road. First runner-up is Chocolate Chip Mint. And the winner is….Maple Nut.

3. If you were to take me on a date, where would we go and why?
Answer: The Fancy Food Show in San Francisco. We bonded over maple and chocolate – what could be more appropriate?

4. Above all else, what are you afraid of?
Answer: SPIDERS!!!

5. What would you do if you knew you couldn’t fail?
Answer: Start a bakery.

6. What has been your favorite age to be and why?
Answer: 52. That’s when we retired and moved to the country. I felt strong and energetic and incredibly free.

7. Coffee or tea?
Answer: No contest! I love, love, love coffee. I even roasted my own beans until I blew up my little makeshift roaster. Some day I’ll get a real one and try again. I drink tea too, but I’m not passionate about it.

Well, that’s certainly enough about me. How about YOU:

Real Life Parenting
The Aliso Kitchen
Dried-on Milk
Crumbs in my Mustachio
Tampa Cake Girl
Hun, What’s for dinner?
Fresh Eggs Daily
Lemony Thyme
Cooking from a Stay at Home Mom
Manila Spoon

Resolution Rye Bread

Posted on January 3, 2014 by Lorinda

If your New Year’s resolution was to eat healthier, I’m probably not going to be your go-to blogger or your best friend. But just this once I’m offering a recipe that is actually pretty good for you! It’s a loose adaption of my Anadama Bread (which is an absolutely delicious bread) because I wanted to keep the corn and molasses base, while aiming for a darker bread using rye flour.

When I drive to town and back this time of year, I have to travel over an icy pass that is teeming with deer, moose, and lots and lots of wild turkeys. I have to take it slow, which gives me about an hour and a half of driving time – perfect for dreaming up recipes. (It beats listening to my own singing!) This is what I was dreaming about on yesterday’s drive:

Resolution Rye Bread

Author: The Rowdy Baker

A dark bread made with rye, wheat, and white flours. Cocoa and molasses give it a beautiful deep color and slightly sweet flavor.

Ingredients

¼ cup coconut oil (or butter if you wish)
½ cup molasses
1 cup cornmeal
1½ cups boiling water
2 packages active dry yeast
1 teaspoon sugar
1 cup very warm water
½ cup buttermilk
1 egg
2 cups rye flour
¼ cup unsweetened cocoa powder
1 tablespoon caraway seeds
1 tablespoon salt
2½ cups whole wheat flour
3 cups all-purpose white flour

Instructions

In a large bowl combine the coconut oil, molasses, cornmeal, and boiling water. Set aside to cool, stirring occasionally.
Put yeast and sugar in a small bowl and pour 1 cup warm water over it. Let it sit until bubbly (about 5 minutes.)
Stir the yeast mixture, buttermilk, egg, rye flour, cocoa powder, and caraway seeds into the cornmeal mixture in the large bowl until well combined. If using a stand mixer, switch to a dough hook at this point.
Add salt and wheat flour. Mix well.
Add the white flour and mix well. If using a stand mixer, allow the mixer to knead the dough for 5 minutes. If your dough isn't coming cleanly away from the side of the bowl, add a little more all-purpose flour. If you will be kneading by hand, drop dough onto well floured board and knead for 7-8 minutes. The dough will look a little crumbly when you begin kneading, but will become soft and elastic.
Grease a large bowl AND your hands (the dough will be slightly sticky) and place the dough in the bowl, turning to coat. Allow to rise until doubled, about 1 hour. Punch down.
Shape dough into loaves. For round loaves, sprinkle a little cornmeal on baking sheet and set the rounds on the cornmeal. For regular loaves, form into two loaf shapes and place in two large greased bread pans.
Let the loaves rise until double, about an hour. For round loaves, slice a cross in the top of the loaf to allow it to expand.
Heat oven to 375 F. Bake for approximately 40 minutes. Coat warm loaves with butter or coconut oil if desired.
Makes two small rounds and a loaf, or two regular loaves or rounds.

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Ingredients.

Such pretty dough. Love the color and elasticity.

Punch it down

Form the dough (I made 1 loaf and 2 small rounds)

Risen and ready to bake!

Brushing the hot (FRAGRANT) loaves with butter for a little shine

I’ve been trying to stay away from bread lately, but threw all my good intentions out the window after making this. But…it really is a healthy option, as long as I don’t get carried away with the butter. Toasted with a little peanut butter? Oh, YEAH!

The Rowdy Baker

Irreverent offerings from a compulsive baker.

Monthly Archives: January 2014

January Fly on the Wall (my 1 year anniversary edition!)

Succulent Salmon Dip (in a crunchy football bowl!)

Football Dip Bowl

Extra Spicy Gingersnaps

Sunshine Award!

Resolution Rye Bread